Merging into a whole and complete self...

As we get closer to the end of the year, I begin to reflect. In about 6 weeks I will reach another milestone in my life. I think back to when I was younger and thought about my plans for the future. I also wonder at this stage in my life am I or have I quite lived to my full potential.

I have always talked about how I am a big underachiever but as I get older, I also realize that I also don't get out of my way. Which brings to mind, self-sabotage...

I need to figure out what I want...what I need to do to stay focused and not doubt the choices that I make no matter how they turn out. When I was younger before I started taking chances, I always kept my eyes on the prize. I said I was going to do something and I did it. I need to learn to combine the old with the new. Train my mind to merge the former with the latter to make a complete "me".

I have truly come far but I don't want to enter my "mid-life" on the verge of a crisis.

Until next time...




-Namaste

Shuck your Shells...

What do you do when it seems like all you are doing is skirting by? I have always prided myself on having a set plan and a way of doing things but lately I feel like I have really given in to the strong ideology of "Leap of Faithism". I have been lucky so far but in the back of my head I feel like I'm playing Russian Roulette with a 6 shooter loaded with 5 in the cylinder.

I am beginning to really hate not knowing and leaving things to chance and faith. Sure I am trying to make things happen as well but for the most part I have been going under the assumption that things will work themselves out. I miss having more control of my life. I need to find away to get back to that person while still being the guy who takes chances when need be. Until then, I will continue to feel the way I do from time to time.

That's all I have for you guys this week.

Until next week...



-Namaste

Is Passive Aggressiveness a bad thing...

So I am what some would call a passive aggressive person. I have been for a long time. Some may say its a bad thing, others may not. (I tend to believe the latter is the extreme minority) Some believe if you hold in your feelings that they manifest themselves in other ways.

I think to some extent that is true but I also believe that as an adult you should be able to control your feelings. I personally have been in situations where if not for my passive aggressive nature, would have done or said things which wouldn't have been pretty. I'd say it has saved me a lot. Don't get me wrong...I'm not praising it. I'm just saying that if has helped me out in my life. It's like my mutant "X-gene"

I just wanted to share this with you guys this week. I actually just thought about this afternoon and couldn't wait to post this. I did work in my sketchbook some this week. I did a little doodling. Next week I will try to get some images up for you guys.

Until next week...


-Namaste